July 3, 2017 dovbaron

Friends Family and FaceBook

I posted a status on Facebook that got some very interesting responses.

If you are on Facebook I’m sure you’ll agree that Facebook in its self is a rather fascinating ‘place’ or phenomena.

Originally, when certain people tried to get me on FB, I was resistant and now I have many thousands of ‘friends’. However, the question I have is do our FB ‘friends’ really know us? Do they even care about who we are, what matters to us, or even what we do?

When I posed the original question on FB so many of my  FB ‘friends’ shared wonderful kind words that touched my heart. I am so grateful to those who replied to my FB status question… I feel enormously honored to be seen by you all and I deeply value our relationship. What was fascinating was that there were many people who I feel I know well who did not write anything, (of course they may never have seen my question). Just as surprising were all the wonderful comments I got from people I did not even know.

Many years ago I gave a presentation on: “Friends when to hold them when to fold them.” I like to share with you a portion of that presentation and you can let me know what you think and feel.

We have all heard people speak of ‘fair weather friends’. These are the people who are your friend in good times

It is said that when you hit hard times ‘fair weather friends’ will move out faster than bugs from a burning mattress. Clearly, it makes sense that if a friend is only there for the good times this isn’t much of a friend.

What I want to share with you are some other kinds of friends you may want to pay attention to, in particular, ‘bad weather friends’. I know you’ve been told that real friends will stick with you in times of trouble, and although that is true there is a certain type of friend who is only really there for you in your bad times.

You can probably remember a time when you were in a crappy relationship and this particular friend was right there for you. They told you that s/he is a fool to let you go.  Or maybe you can remember a time when you were in serious financial ‘doo-doo’, and that certain friend was once again, right there for you, telling you that ‘they’ just don’t see your talents and skills.

In fact, the worse things get the closer this kind of friend is. I can almost hear you say; “well what’s wrong with that?”

It’s not that there is something wrong with it, in fact, I would agree that a ‘real friend’ would be there for you in such times.  As much as I highly suggest that you be in full gratitude for those who are genuinely there for you in such times of challenge. That being said; we may want to examine this kind of relationship with at least the same level of inquiry as that of a ‘fair weather friend’.

In the case of a ‘fair weather friend,’ it’s pretty easy to see why the person is your friend, but have you ever considered why a ‘bad weather friend’ might be hanging out? Just as you might notice a ‘fair weather friend’ fade into the distance during tough times, a ‘bad weather friend’ will disappear during the good times, (particularly if the good times last).

At this point you may be wondering why a ‘bad weather friend’ would go away in good times, well the answer may surprise you. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying:

Misery Loves Company!

There will always be these type of people in your life because at either a conscious or unconscious level they find that you being in the crapper allows them to feel better about themselves.

A ‘bad weather friend’ is incredibly supportive when you are down, however, when you are up, you are seen as a threat. They may even use the kind of language that will tell you what kind of friend they really are.  If they say:  “when you become successful, find a lover, get promoted, (or any other kind of status change) you won’t want to be around me anymore.” This is the language of a ‘bad weather friend’.

Good friends, real friends, are there for you in both the good and the bad times. When things are tough they will hold you and tell you what’s great about you. However, when you are wallowing they will kick your ass to get you going if that’s what it takes. This same good friend will be overjoyed for your success in any given area. They want the best for you even if it means that for you to be truly happy and fulfilled they could lose out.

Real friends want you to become all that you are at that soulful level of fulfilling your potential.

A real friend would rather walk away than support you playing small.


A real friend will lift you up so that you can describe the view ahead and in turn inspire them to go to the next level.

I said earlier that Misery Loves Company, well so does Joy! So…

Get yourself around those who are playing big in all areas, especially joy!

I am a blessed man in more ways than I can say here. However, one way I know this for certain is I am surrounded by “Real Friends”. Some I have known for years, some I have known for moments. Some are blood family, some are a spiritual family. Some I have hugged and kissed with deep affection, some I know only via the electronic world of this blog and some even through Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube.

However, we know each other, I thank you for being more than a ‘fair weather friend’ or a ‘bad weather friend’.

I am deeply grateful for each of you who lift me up upon your shoulders to shine a light out into the world.

Thank you for celebrating my success, and telling everyone you know about what I teach.

I deeply enjoyed the FaceBook responses, so I  have copied my question and some of the responses below as I thought you’d enjoy the wise and sometimes funny insights:

My Question: Are we friends? If you do consider me a friend, please tell me why that is.

  • Alexander Kozupytsya
    I heard a lot of good things about you plus you like Tom Jones! They say you’re the new Anthony Robbins….the self-help buffs!
  • Danielle-Nicole Lareau
    Because..you are me..and I like who you are..pure love and compassion my friend…ciao for now Dani
  • Tracy Lee… You are my friend my brother and my inspiration and motivation, I love you for a multitude of reasons that stem back to my childhood, and I honor and thank you for being YOU for as long as I can remember, the only authentic soul I have ever known. xxx
  • Andrea Lachner.  Facebook (and My Space and Twitter LOL) has opened a whole new world to us – we can become ‘friends’ with people we’ve never met (and possibly never will meet) in person. Not to mention people in completely different time zones. Why do I become ‘friends’ with someone like you? Because you are inspiring!!! And I am always keen to read what you have for us to read & think about.
    I have learned along the way that there are many different types of friends in our lives. There are the ones that will always be in your life no matter where in the world we each end up. There are the ones that are friends to you only when they need you or when you yourself need them. Which is a paradox to the saying that some people are your friends only in the good times – yup, I know of people that are only your friend in bad times – weird huh? 🙂 But nevertheless, every person we meet (in person or these days in cyberspace) has something to offer to our lives in some way or another.
    The word ‘friend’ has many more meanings and levels to it than just one or 2 words 🙂
    My 2 cents worth this early in the morning (for me) LOL…
    Love and light XX… Read More
  • Krystal Pine
    I love you, Dov, because you are kind and considerate, but also, you have a backbone and stand up for the truth, you are gentle and honest.
  • Rosally Saltsman
    Yes. A friend is someone you trust, who possesses qualities you admire, who shares things in common with you and with whom you feel an emotional or spiritual chemistry. A friend is someone whom you feel you can grow through or with and help them to grow as well. It isn’t unusual for today’s technology or higher spiritual awareness to have friends you’ve never met. It’s just hard to have friends you never see.
  • Kim Dushinski… Yes, I consider you a friend because you have gone dog walking with me more times than you know. (Via my MP3 player, of course).
  • Natalie Gibson
    Because you are who you are and you’re not afraid to show it because you’re continually pushing your own growth at an exponential rate, because you are profoundly integral with yourself and with others, because you don’t bullshit me with social nice disease and because we laugh and have fun together. simple, really.
  • Naseem Rahman
    We are born into our families and we are related to them by blood. Yet, there are some people who enter our lives for a reason and they become a part of our family, leaving a lasting impression on our lives. You are one such person in my life, Dov. You are my friend, my consultant, my guide and the voice of reason for me when the chips are down & I … feel cornered in a dark place. You are God’s gift to this universe, making it a better place to live. May the light of your enlightenment spread to places afar …You are simply the BEST….with Love Naseem

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With gratitude,

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Comments (47)

  1. Anonymous

    Hi Dov,

    Not really friends – we haven’t shared enough stuff as individuals. The ‘broadcast’ of posts and such doesn’t really build enough individual rapport for me. I think facebook ‘friends’ aren’t really friends until we’ve built up some individual conversations. Maybe we need another word for social media ‘friends’. I do really value your content, and I like the personal way you have of communicating.

  2. Dov,
    Thanks for posting this little article.I have had my fair share of “bad weather friends” in my life.Correct me if I’m wrong,a “bad weather friend” can also,while being there for you when your down,do things literally to hold you back from succeeding in an almost passive aggressive way.
    My wife and I have known a boss who seemingly will cause a scheduling conflict when we have plans for her book or my weekends off to do family stuff.This happens all the time.He’ll often comment on how great he thinks we are doing what we do,but then complains we are taking too much time to do it while making sure our spare time is filled up with last minute J.O.B. duties.

    I have to apologize here as I was one of those that didn’t post to your friendship question.I read it,considered what I would write,looked at what others had read and simply couldn’t have said it any better.I want to take the time here to THANK YOU for all that you have done for me(and continue to do) and everyone else.You are one those people who garner instant trust and mutual respect.It is my sincere hope that we can continue our relationship and that it continues to grow.

    Pieter

  3. MaryR

    Your blog touched close to my heart because it’s a tough lesson I’ve learned recently. Many of my proclaimed ‘close’ friends were there when I had my head down. As I began taking a great deal of postive steps in accountability and making measureable shifts in my beliefs & perceptions in my life, I became aware that the ‘close’ friends were noticeably absent when I’ve had cause to celebrate – even skipped out on my 40th!. They were absent with accolades and kind words in some of the smaller triumphs I’ve made and through the grapevine heard I was being slammed quite a lot by these same people. I’ve been developing a better and most def an authentic support system and helping some of my longer time friends understand my changes and if they are onboard – great. It has been a chore, way understatement, to train myself to contact my real friends in either my up or down times – but more specifically when I need that atta girl, you keep it up pat on the back. I had to break the addiction I had to the thoughts I had about them – “I just know they have something good to say about this accomplishment – I’ve given them encouragement and praise for theirs…and been there even when they are down…” I’ve felt so much more self-worth in breaking that addiction. I don’t have to struggle to get value and recognition reflected back to me.

  4. Annette

    Hi Dov;

    I didn’t see your FB post. I have taken all of your programs. (Missed a few of your open dialogue days.) But I have to say that I consider you my friend because you wouldn’t let me slack off or give up when (more than once) I wanted to throw in the towel. I am sooooo grateful to you for having the commitment to my growth because it has all been worth it and very beneficial for me in the end. To your continued success. Love and Hugs Annette <3

  5. You came into my life for a reason just at the right time and by no accident. Even though I might not connect with you on weekly or monthly basis when I do think of you my heart wells up with love and gratitude. There you have it my friend. Much love and hugs,
    Brenda

  6. Anita Moon

    Hi Dov, didn’t see the FB post & so didn’t reply to it.
    Having said that, I have read through your blog & comments above & can agree on most of it.
    Since being serve with a bankruptcy notice 5 days ago – its amazing how many people have run & how many have stayed….the majority in the former.
    It seems that being in debt still has a social stigma attached to it for some…….for me it is the first step in being free of financial hardship & a chance to enjoy the true riches of life, that is: to enjoy the people who stayed. Thank you.

  7. Great question. This type of question has bubbled in my head a few years ago as I was personally questioning to myself what are real friendships I have. When I was pondering this question, I was actually thinking two way friendships. It is clear to me in myself when I’m being a friend to someone else but I started to recognize me being a friend in itself does not automatically equate to a friendship because I started to recognize some people I was a friend to, I had to recognize that is all it was. Me being a friend to them but they were not really being a friend to me. But there was also the aspect do I even allow the space for someone to be able to be a friend and I think in some cases I’ve just been comfortable being a friend rather than developing a friendship. It is still something to work and play at in life around all types of relationships and Dov you’ve been a light shining brightly to me to ask myself deeper questions around these areas of life and also do something about what I learn to make changes in life.For me you are clearly a friend. Hearing you as a speaker and educator on such topics is only where it starts. You are way more than just that. Your wisdom and humour, passion care and way of being so authentic and I just love that about you as a person in our world. You are an inspiration to be that way in the world and you got a deepness about you so it so refreshing in a world where a lot of people seem only interest in surface stuff. You are a friend in that sense of showing me, hey there are cool people in the world that are willing to be very deep but at the same time be light, fun and unique. You add so much to my life just being who you are. I gain greatly from your presence in our world so on that level you are a friend and mentor role. However , now I’ve got to meet you in person too. Before that, your light was shining brightly from other side of planet. Now I got to see your light shining brightly in person. Both as a speaker at an event and also afterwards spending some time with you one on one. That was way cool aspect of you being you. A real genuine friend. You pointed out sites for me to look at in your city and really special you showing me where this forest was one of your students walks around in as he uses your EFM audio technology. You also recommended things I could do to take in what I was learning deeper. You give so much of yourself in so many ways that to me you are this new friend. I always like to see what any person is like one on one because to be honest I can see and sense lot of people in our world can be very different in person to what they seem to be in other environments like group settings, media, tv, internet etc etc. and Dov the person anyone sees in various mediums and environments is the same authentic person I meet in person to. You are a wonderful friend to the world I live in for all people by your example of the way you be and personally your way of being with me is another level of friendship I value greatly. Thank you so much for being a friend Dov. I most certainly consider you a friend. Your light shines brightly in so many ways and what bubbles up in me is how can I be a better friend to Dov ? Is showing pics of people with dodgy looking moes beng a friend? lol

  8. Mary

    I like your messages and that you’re part of the answers rather than the problems that we face. I hope blessings find you everyday. As far as the social media, unless I know someone, have looked into their eyes, I’ve a hard time trusting them. Some people are family and friends, some are nice strangers who share some of my values but don’t really know me, and probably wouldn’t miss me if I could not be found. I wish to be wrong about that.

    • Yes Mary,
      I too like the eye contact moments. Those are the one where the mask falls away and the heart opens to reveal whatever is beneath.
      Dov…

  9. Glen Friesen

    The day I first met you I knew you to be my friend. Your truths and insights cut me to the soul and you forced me to reposition myself in this world. (I had lost my way). What I treasure the most is that I have never felt you are “too big” to listen or spend time answering my questions. Your no BS honesty is worth more than you will know. I love your sense of humor. You inspire me to keep pushing the edge of my comfort zone. I will never be the same. Thank you for everything you have given.

    • Thank you Glen,

      All to often we think that people are our friends because they say “nice” things to us, while in fact a real friend is one who is willing to tell us the truth even if we’d prefer the nice stuff. With gratitude, Dov…

  10. Anonymous

    Hi Dov, it makes me so proud when i read all these wonderful responses, because i truly value you as a friend and mentor. we have not met yet and yet there is a bond, a familierness, a sharing of ideals and beliefs which join us. Your in your face, tell it how it is philosophy is completely in line with my own. I look forward to the day we meet my friend, thank you so much Dov! ‘You are the man!’

    • Hey John,

      It seems to me that one of the true signs of friendship is that friends mentor each other. Friendship in many ways is the reflection of wisdom that we speak being spoken back to us. I deeply and sincerely thank you for your very generous words. I look forward to the day when we will sit together over a Guinness . Dov…

      • Anonymous

        I look forward to that day with impatience, I’m sure we have so much to discuss. and yes a pint of the black stuff will help as well. Cheers my friend. and keep up the great inspiration. cheers John

  11. evanhadkins

    Hi Dov,Not really friends – we haven't shared enough stuff as individuals. The 'broadcast' of posts and such doesn't really build enough individual rapport for me. I think facebook 'friends' aren't really friends until we've built up some individual conversations. Maybe we need another word for social media 'friends'. I do really value your content, and I like the personal way you have of communicating.

  12. Dov, Thanks for posting this little article.I have had my fair share of “bad weather friends” in my life.Correct me if I'm wrong,a “bad weather friend” can also,while being there for you when your down,do things literally to hold you back from succeeding in an almost passive aggressive way. My wife and I have known a boss who seemingly will cause a scheduling conflict when we have plans for her book or my weekends off to do family stuff.This happens all the time.He'll often comment on how great he thinks we are doing what we do,but then complains we are taking too much time to do it while making sure our spare time is filled up with last minute J.O.B. duties. I have to apologize here as I was one of those that didn't post to your friendship question.I read it,considered what I would write,looked at what others had read and simply couldn't have said it any better.I want to take the time here to THANK YOU for all that you have done for me(and continue to do) and everyone else.You are one those people who garner instant trust and mutual respect.It is my sincere hope that we can continue our relationship and that it continues to grow.Pieter

  13. MaryR

    Your blog touched close to my heart because it's a tough lesson I've learned recently. Many of my proclaimed 'close' friends were there when I had my head down. As I began taking a great deal of postive steps in accountability and making measureable shifts in my beliefs & perceptions in my life, I became aware that the 'close' friends were noticeably absent when I've had cause to celebrate – even skipped out on my 40th!. They were absent with accolades and kind words in some of the smaller triumphs I've made and through the grapevine heard I was being slammed quite a lot by these same people. I've been developing a better and most def an authentic support system and helping some of my longer time friends understand my changes and if they are onboard – great. It has been a chore, way understatement, to train myself to contact my real friends in either my up or down times – but more specifically when I need that atta girl, you keep it up pat on the back. I had to break the addiction I had to the thoughts I had about them – “I just know they have something good to say about this accomplishment – I've given them encouragement and praise for theirs…and been there even when they are down…” I've felt so much more self-worth in breaking that addiction. I don't have to struggle to get value and recognition reflected back to me.

  14. Annette

    Hi Dov;I didn't see your FB post. I have taken all of your programs. (Missed a few of your open dialogue days.) But I have to say that I consider you my friend because you wouldn't let me slack off or give up when (more than once) I wanted to throw in the towel. I am sooooo grateful to you for having the commitment to my growth because it has all been worth it and very beneficial for me in the end. To your continued success. Love and Hugs Annette <3

  15. You came into my life for a reason just at the right time and by no accident. Even though I might not connect with you on weekly or monthly basis when I do think of you my heart wells up with love and gratitude. There you have it my friend. Much love and hugs,Brenda

  16. Anita Moon

    Hi Dov, didn't see the FB post & so didn't reply to it.Having said that, I have read through your blog & comments above & can agree on most of it.Since being serve with a bankruptcy notice 5 days ago – its amazing how many people have run & how many have stayed….the majority in the former.It seems that being in debt still has a social stigma attached to it for some…….for me it is the first step in being free of financial hardship & a chance to enjoy the true riches of life, that is: to enjoy the people who stayed. Thank you.

  17. Rosally Saltsman

    I think we need to give the benefit of the doubt to bad weather friends. Many people are too busy to engage in social activities. They don’t have time for their friends because time is at a premium. But when they really need them, they’re there. It would be nice if they had time to be there always but if I need a friend (and I frequently do) (I always do), it’s a comfort to know I have friends with an umbrella with my ame on it.

    • Rosally,
      As you point out, we are all busy, from my point of view friendship is not particularly about time. Friendship in the way I’m discussing it here is about being in resonance with the highest and best for yourself and your friend.
      Dov…

  18. Shaun

    Great question. This type of question has bubbled in my head a few years ago as I was personally questioning to myself what are real friendships I have. When I was pondering this question, I was actually thinking two way friendships. It is clear to me in myself when I'm being a friend to someone else but I started to recognize me being a friend in itself does not automatically equate to a friendship because I started to recognize some people I was a friend to, I had to recognize that is all it was. Me being a friend to them but they were not really being a friend to me. But there was also the aspect do I even allow the space for someone to be able to be a friend and I think in some cases I've just been comfortable being a friend rather than developing a friendship. It is still something to work and play at in life around all types of relationships and Dov you've been a light shining brightly to me to ask myself deeper questions around these areas of life and also do something about what I learn to make changes in life.For me you are clearly a friend. Hearing you as a speaker and educator on such topics is only where it starts. You are way more than just that. Your wisdom and humour, passion care and way of being so authentic and I just love that about you as a person in our world. You are an inspiration to be that way in the world and you got a deepness about you so it so refreshing in a world where a lot of people seem only interest in surface stuff. You are a friend in that sense of showing me, hey there are cool people in the world that are willing to be very deep but at the same time be light, fun and unique. You add so much to my life just being who you are. I gain greatly from your presence in our world so on that level you are a friend and mentor role. However , now I've got to meet you in person too. Before that, your light was shining brightly from other side of planet. Now I got to see your light shining brightly in person. Both as a speaker at an event and also afterwards spending some time with you one on one. That was way cool aspect of you being you. A real genuine friend. You pointed out sites for me to look at in your city and really special you showing me where this forest was one of your students walks around in as he uses your EFM audio technology. You also recommended things I could do to take in what I was learning deeper. You give so much of yourself in so many ways that to me you are this new friend. I always like to see what any person is like one on one because to be honest I can see and sense lot of people in our world can be very different in person to what they seem to be in other environments like group settings, media, tv, internet etc etc. and Dov the person anyone sees in various mediums and environments is the same authentic person I meet in person to. You are a wonderful friend to the world I live in for all people by your example of the way you be and personally your way of being with me is another level of friendship I value greatly. That you so much for being a friend Dov. I most certainly consider you a friend. Your light shines brightly in so many ways and what bubbles up in me is how can I be a better friend to Dov ? Is showing pics of people with dodgy looking moes beng a friend? lol

  19. Mary

    I like your messages and that you're part of the answers rather than the problems that we face. I hope blessings find you everyday. As far as the social media, unless I know someone, have looked into their eyes, I've a hard time trusting them. Some people are family and friends, some are nice strangers who share some of my values but don't really know me, and probably wouldn't miss me if I could not be found. I wish to be wrong about that.

    • Yes Mary,I too like the eye contact moments. Those are the one where the mask falls away and the heart opens to reveal whatever is beneath.Dov…

  20. Anonymous

    Dov: You are my teacher, a higher and more respected realm than friend
    A friend lasts a day, a year, a lifetime, a teacher and his teachings last forever In gratitude for you and your teachings Sharone Elizabeth

    • Sharone,
      I deeply and sincerely thank you for your very generous words. Such salutations from a woman as wise as yourself is accepted with reverence.
      Dov…

  21. Glen Friesen

    The day I first met you I knew you to be my friend. Your truths and insights cut me to the soul and you forced me to reposition myself in this world. (I had lost my way). What most impressed me most is that I have never felt you are “too big” to listen or spend time answering my questions. Your no BS honesty is worth more than you will know. I love your sense of humor. You inspire me to keep pushing the edge of my comfort zone. I will never be the same. Thank you for everything you have given.

    • Thank you Glen,All to often we think that people are our friends because they say “nice” things to us, while in fact a real friend is one who is willing to tell us the truth even if we'd prefer the nice stuff. With gratitude, Dov…

  22. George Greenwood

    Hi Dov.

    Frienship is probably a misunderstood or at least a misused word in our language. To me a true friend, as you say, is there both in the good times and bad, standing with me no matter what I do. A true friend is there to correct what I do and not be afraid of the consequenses – because they are authentic.

    You have shown me, through your incredible programs, what a friend can be and how relationships can be genuine based on truth (my truth).

    True friendship is not about time or results, it is about belief in that person.
    Thank you for your belief.

    • Yes, George I fully agree that the word friendship is thrown around without even considering that friendship is a responsability.

  23. Anonymous

    Dear Dov, Spirit blew your teachings into my life and as always, the spiritual choreography is perfect. You have already shaped my thinking and being. You remind us in your poem that we always see ourselves in others. I see a lot of myself in you, your determind attitude, your passion to make a difference, your compassion, your no bullshit attitude, your gentleness, your fun loving self, your deep interest in the whole picture, and perhaps more that I don’t yet see. Does that make us friends? Does sharing my deepest self through the individual work with you allow me to call you my friend? I would wish it so but I would not presume it automatically. On one level however you are my closest friend at this time for you are standing at the doorway of my soul in serious but compassionate dialogue with me about my life. I invited you in with trust and love. I know as souls we are all here to help each other in whatever way that may show itself. With that thought in mind of course you are my friend and I yours. We are all part of the blessed whole. Thank you Dov for being there, for being my friend, for seeing me and guiding me. With love and gratitude, Lindsey.

  24. johneregan

    Hi Dov, it makes me so proud when i read all these wonderful responses, because i truly value you as a friend and mentor. we have not met yet and yet there is a bond, a familierness, a sharing of ideals and beliefs which join us. Your in your face, tell it how it is philosophy is completely in line with my own. I look forward to the day we meet my friend, thank you so much Dov! 'You are the man!'

    • Hey John,It seems to me that one of the true signs of friendship is that friends mentor each other. Friendship in many ways is the reflection of wisdom that we speak being spoken back to us. I deeply and sincerely thank you for your very generous words. I look forward to the day when we will sit together over a Guinness . Dov…

      • johneregan

        I look forward to that day with impatience, I'm sure we have so much to discuss. and yes a pint of the black stuff will help as well. Cheers my friend. and keep up the great inspiration. cheers John

  25. Rosally Saltsman

    I think we need to give the benefit of the doubt to bad weather friends. Many people are too busy to engage in social activities. They don't have time for their friends because time is at a premium. But when they really need them, they're there. It would be nice if they had time to be there always but if I need a friend (and I frequently do) (I always do), it's a comfort to know I have friends with an umbrella with my ame on it.

    • Rosally, As you point out, we are all busy, from my point of view friendship is not particularly about time. Friendship in the way I'm discussing it here is about being in resonance with the highest and best for yourself and your friend.Dov…

  26. sharoneelizabeth

    Dov: You are my teacher, a higher and more respected realm than friendA friend lasts a day, a year, a lifetime, a teacher and his teachings last forever In gratitude for you and your teachings Sharone Elizabeth

    • Sharone,I deeply and sincerely thank you for your very generous words. Such salutations from a woman as wise as yourself is accepted with reverence.Dov…

  27. George Greenwood

    Hi Dov. Frienship is probably a misunderstood or at least a misused word in our language. To me a true friend, as you say, is there both in the good times and bad, standing with me no matter what I do. A true friend is there to correct what I do and not be afraid of the consequenses – because they are authentic.You have shown me, through your incredible programs, what a friend can be and how relationships can be genuine based on truth (my truth).True friendship is not about time or results, it is about belief in that person.Thank you for your belief.

    • Yes, George I fully agree that the word friendship is thrown around without even considering that friendship is a responsability.

  28. lindseywalker

    Dear Dov, Spirit blew your teachings into my life and as always, the spiritual choreography is perfect. You have already shaped my thinking and being. You remind us in your poem that we always see ourselves in others. I see a lot of myself in you, your determind attitude, your passion to make a difference, your compassion, your no bullshit attitude, your gentleness, your fun loving self, your deep interest in the whole picture, and perhaps more that I don't yet see. Does that make us friends? Does sharing my deepest self through the individual work with you allow me to call you my friend? I would wish it so but I would not presume it automatically. On one level however you are my closest friend at this time for you are standing at the doorway of my soul in serious but compassionate dialogue with me about my life. I invited you in with trust and love. I know as souls we are all here to help each other in whatever way that may show itself. With that thought in mind of course you are my friend and I yours. We are all part of the blessed whole. Thank you Dov for being there, for being my friend, for seeing me and guiding me. With love and gratitude, Lindsey.

  29. Florin

    How are you Dov? 😀
    I don’t really expect something in return from friends. All I want is to love them and offer my services the best way I can at that moment. Like if you contact me and ask me to help you with something I will do it with my heart even if I don’t know you because the intention itself to do good helps you, not always the result of my work.Reading your posts I really wish I would know you better 🙂 , but I really don’t know much about myself 😆

  30. Anonymous

    Thanks Dov for posting this article. As usual you demonstrate and provoke a lot of thought processes to occur in all of us BMI participants. I tend to think of friends not as fair weather or bad weather, but more in terms of my relationships with them. Some friends are closer than others and the true ones are there to not only pick me up and support me in bad times, but participate in celebrating the good times as well. I also realise partly based on your teachings that everything and everyone comes into our lives for a reason. So I tend to celebrate new and old friends entering my life at whatever point I am at in my life. It is because of my activity in Facebook that I have been so fortunate as to reconnect with friends that had left my life for a while but for no really good reason. And in reconnecting with these friends I found that although our own lives had changed and shifted, we still were able to converse with each other as though we hadn’t ever been out of each others lives.

    I missed your request for comments regarding the quality of friendships that one can have with thousands of Facebook friends and questioning what friendship really is. I have been so fortunate to have met you and participated in your workshops over the last year and a half and have so much gratitude for you and your teachings. I consider you my friend because you take my best interests in personal development personally, and you genuinely wish for my success and growth. And I believe that it is in the way that you connect with each individual that makes them feel that you are each individual’s friend. Do I feel that connection? You betcha! And it’s why I came to help out at the last Attracting Force. I will continue to want to help you out and to get to know you better when given the opportunity. That’s, I believe, how friendships are built. It is an honour to know you and have you as my friend.

  31. Florin

    How are you Dov? :DI don't really expect something in return from friends. All I want is to love them and offer my services the best way I can at that moment. Like if you contact me and ask me to help you with something I will do it with my heart even if I don't know you because the intention itself to do good helps you, not always the result of my work.Reading your posts I really wish I would know you better 🙂 , but I really don't know much about myself 😆

  32. KeithLloyd

    Thanks Dov for posting this article. As usual you demonstrate and provoke a lot of thought processes to occur in all of us BMI participants. I tend to think of friends not as fair weather or bad weather, but more in terms of my relationships with them. Some friends are closer than others and the true ones are there to not only pick me up and support me in bad times, but participate in celebrating the good times as well. I also realise partly based on your teachings that everything and everyone comes into our lives for a reason. So I tend to celebrate new and old friends entering my life at whatever point I am at in my life. It is because of my activity in Facebook that I have been so fortunate as to reconnect with friends that had left my life for a while but for no really good reason. And in reconnecting with these friends I found that although our own lives had changed and shifted, we still were able to converse with each other as though we hadn't ever been out of each others lives.I missed your request for comments regarding the quality of friendships that one can have with thousands of Facebook friends and questioning what friendship really is. I have been so fortunate to have met you and participated in your workshops over the last year and a half and have so much gratitude for you and your teachings. I consider you my friend because you take my best interests in personal development personally, and you genuinely wish for my success and growth. And I believe that it is in the way that you connect with each individual that makes them feel that you are each individual's friend. Do I feel that connection? You betcha! And it's why I came to help out at the last Attracting Force. I will continue to want to help you out and to get to know you better when given the opportunity. That's, I believe, how friendships are built. It is an honour to know you and have you as my friend.

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MORE FOR LEADERSHIP SKILL


DOV BARON IS THE LEADING EXPERT ON AUTHENTIC LEADERSHIP AND GENERATING A FIERCELY LOYAL CULTURE.

Get in touch with Dov!

Video Introduction

Full Monty Leadership: Bring Dov In Today – Click to Book Now

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The Top 3 Reasons “Leaders” are losing their Star Players!

The Top 3 Reasons
“Leaders” are losing their Star Players!

Unless you have been living under a rock for the past few years, you know that the recession has aggravated what already was a deteriorating relationship between employers and their employees. While things weren’t rosy before, now everyone knows someone (or has experienced it themselves!) who has been caught in layoffs, buyouts, downsizing, capsizing, and reductions in benefits, not to mention freezes on new hires, pay raises, and promotions.

And you also know the result: People are willing to abandon companies like the proverbial rats on a sinking ship because no one feels safe!

The reason isn’t rocket science. If you even suspect that the ship you are on could go down and something else comes along, there’s a good chance you’d jump ship too. Think about it.  The fear doesn’t have to be based on facts; a nasty corrosive rumour can have people racing toward the exits just as easily.

A Wharton School of Business article says that most companies can expect to lose anywhere between 20 and 50 percent of their employees in any given year. Few things are more disruptive and costly to your business than an unexpected exodus from your talent pool.

If you want loyalty, you must focus on culture over rhetoric!  Regardless of position, title, or even office size, employees who volitional walk away, generally do so because they perceive some type of disconnect with leadership and/or the values of the company. (This is best reflected in the corporate culture)

It’s no surprise to any of us, but employee loyalty is not what it used to be. In a recent survey of employee benefits, trends, and attitudes, MetLife found that employee loyalty is at a seven-year low.

So what are the Top 3 Reasons “Leaders” lose their Star Players?

Leaders must learn how to deal with conflict.

Be honest, I mean really honest. Are you comfortable with conflict?  By that I don’t mean that you are aggressively looking for some form of fight, but when conflict comes up, can you confront it with compassion and empathy? Do have the skills to resolve the issues?

If not, you can be certain that your team’s morale is going to tank faster than a preschooler who needs a nap because conflict is the nature of relationship.

You’ve got to understand that crappy moral is contagious!  Problems that don’t get addressed, be they feuds between departments (silos), interpersonal quarrels, or performance issues all negatively impact employee enthusiasm, motivation, and ultimately loyalty.

Before we go any further, I want to set something straight…small problems do not go away. Small problems that are ignored develop into resentment, and will develop into bigger problems. (Don’t believe me? Ask the person you live with…Go on, I dare you.)

A leader who does not–or cannot–deal with conflict will immediately start to lose the trust and respect of her/his employees. And you and I both know that you can’t lead without trust and respect.

That being said, a leader who is a master of conflict resolution knows that healthy conflict creates a deepening bond. (Again, if you don’t believe me, ask the person you live with if, after you have actually stopped avoiding the conflict and got it all out on the table, they inevitably feel closer to you.)

Leaders must become masterful at dealing with generational diversity.

Generational bias has always been an issue, however, now more than ever in a global economy, it can be a crippling one.  As a discerning leader, I am going to ask you an important question. Do you believe that a Baby Boomer (people born between 1946 and 1964), Generation Xer (people born between mid 1960s to the early 1980s), Millennial (people born between 1982 and 2000) are all treated equally in the climb to the top?

Here’s an example from way back in the last century. I can remember when I first started speaking to individuals and organizations of influence back in the 80s. At that time, I came across research that said it took a rookie over 100 hours to learn the skills to become a fighter pilot.

It was estimated that that same level of training could be completed to competence in around 20 hours by a GenXer because of their much higher exposure to technology. Then came the Millennials. These latest members of the work force have grown up with even more electronic interface than the generation X group, and as a result their TQ (technical intelligence) far exceeds those of the last two generations.

The challenge can be that as a leader you are likely to be either a Boomer or an Xer, have likely climbed through the ranks and invested a considerable amount of time in getting where you are today. Now you are likely to find yourself leading Millennials, while having an empathetic bias towards your own generation.

You see, part of the challenge is that we often (even unconsciously) use the time we’ve put in, rather than effectiveness, as a standard of measure. Furthermore, even if we are measuring the effectiveness of our top players, our leaders, it’s important that we examine whether our criteria for measurement may also be outdated.

The challenge is that if the criteria by which we measure authentic leadership remain the same as it was for old school leadership, we won’t be able to recognise the value that is in front of us.

 

Leaders must learn how to lead in new ways.

The most important of the Top 3 Reasons “Leaders” are losing their Star Players is because of Inauthentic Leadership!

There was a time when a leader could lead through image, reputation, experience, force or any combination thereof…However, hold on to your seats. Ladies and Gentlemen, because that train has already left the station!

Today, if you want to keep your star players, you had better find out who they are, what they care about, what “really” motivates them, and how they want to be rewarded for great work. (Check out my special report called: The Full Monty Fierce Loyalty Generator http://FMLoyalty.com)

What this means is that if you want to generate fierce loyalty in your team (and ultimately in your customer and supplier base,) you have to show up and let them see you…warts and all.

I realize that this flies in the face of what you originally learned about being a leader and elevating yourself away from your “underlings.” Although that might have worked at some point in time, that outdated model will have your Star Players deserting you and your company so fast it will make your head spin!

Of course, there are far more than three reasons Leaders are losing their Star Players. I have just focused on the top three so that you can begin incorporating change right away.

In summary, if you want to keep your Star Players you must become a master of dealing with conflict in a healthy way. You will also need to seek to understand the other generations you are working with, remembering they likely have different values and priorities than you). And finally, you must be willing to let your people in, let them see that you are more than your title, or even your experience. Let them see you as a person!

Despite what you’ve been told, the truth is that Vulnerability is Power in the new global economy!

 

For opportunities to have Dõv Baron speak for your organization, Call:

+1 (778) 379-7517

or contact admin@fullmontyleadership.com

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Business Growth What’s Your Business Doing?
I need to ask you an important question. What’s your business doing?  Is it growing, staying about the same or losing ground?  Now let’s be brutally honest—and I suspect if you are like most business owners, you may be tempted to deny this–but if your business isn’t growing, it’s dying!

Now that you’ve caught your breath, let’s get clear about what I mean by growing. Growing in this context is NOT about experiencing 1%-3% growthdue to the fact that you laid off a bunch of people or radically cut cost and potentially the quality of what you do/produce. That’s not growing. That’s slowing the dying process.

Real growth is more than temporarily increasing the profit margin. If we are going to talk growth in business, one of the key areas we have to discuss is the quality of the leadership.

It could be argued that leadership is the most important quality for any business professional to have. With quality leadership, nearly any and every task can be accomplished.  Think about a leader you have known in the past.  This could be a boss, a teacher, a pastor, a congressman. Did this person inspire you? Did they make you angry, or did they not affect you at all?

If you said they didn’t affect you, you’d be wrong. Despite what you may believe, there is a powerful and somewhat destructive impact of having leaders who don’t inspire us.  And the main reason leaders don’t inspire is because they are disengaged.

We know from a 2011 Gallup Poll that 71% of American workers are “not engaged” or are “actively disengaged” in their work. But don’t be fooled into thinking it’s just the worker bees who are disengaged. Many top level C-suite executives are just as disengaged.  These leaders close their office doors and distance themselves from the group they are supposed to be leading.

Obviously, this sort of leadership is not the kind you desire in your organization.  But I hate to break it to you, but there’s a very good chance that you have leaders like that in your own organization. These “leaders” have positions of authority and you may even be assuming that they are leading in the direction of growth. However, where they are really leading is in the direction of keeping their position, title, status and or lifestyle. They are not mission, purpose or growth driven. They are not actively engaged in the corporate value system. They are, however, tremendously engaged in increasing their own personal bottom lines.

They are disengaged leaders!

Now you may still want to argue that it’s not the leadership that is the problem with lack of growth in your company, but with employees who don’t care.

Let me let you in on a dirty little secret. Employees disengage for one of three reasons:

  1. 1. They are being led by a disengaged leader.
  2. 2. They are at odds with the organization’s mission/purpose and or values.
  3. 3. They are a bad fit for your corporate culture. (Assuming your company actually has a corporate culture that’s more than a concept.)

Here’s the hard line truth behind all three of these reasons: employees disengage because leaders are disengaged at some level and therefore not authentically leading!

Let’s take a closer look at those three reasons.

First, if employees have a disengaged leader, you can pretty much guarantee they will become lazy themselves.  This is not necessarily because employees are inherently lazy, but rather, because employees (like children) do not do what they are told; they simply model the behaviour of their superiors.  If the leader doesn’t care about the growth of the company, neither will the employees.

When a team is led by a disengaged leader, there’s a good chance that team members will simply just do what they have to do in order to meet their job description, and not do anything to grow themselves or your organization.

Second, when employees are at odds with the organization’s mission/purpose and or values this again indicates poor leadership, because your leaders need to be crystal clear that every person who enters your employ fully understands the organization’s mission/purpose and or values. This is not possible if the leaders themselves do not understand it.

Let me give you an example. In 2006 a multinational company brought us to Europe to work with their leadership team. This was a dramatically impactful training that clearly rattled a lot of cages. Instead of my just coming in and doing the usual rah-rah, look how great you folks are, now let’s just pat each other on the back, I challenged the heck out of them.

Why did I do this? In my pre-interview with the individuals on the team, it became obvious that they were relationally disconnected from each other. This told me they were likely disconnected from the company as a whole and were therefore in all likelihood working in a silo mentality.

After a lengthy discussion with the global CEO about the need to break these silos and get the team to genuinely not only connect but bond, we went back into session.

I began by asking a single pointed question that they were required to answer out loud in fort of their peers and without the assistance of their peers. This simple question clearly caused the blood pressure of the CEO to rise. The question was:  “Would you please state out loud the mission statement of this company?” Each answer clearly demonstrated a challenge at the core of the company because no one (with exception of the Global CEO) actually knew the answer.

No wonder they were disengaged. You cannot expect your team to be fully engaged in the growth of a company when their only connection is a paycheck. Everyone in your organization must be aligned with the mission, purpose and vision of the company if it is to experience true growth.

Finally, if an employee is a bad fit for your culture, this again falls on leadership.  If the corporate culture isn’t lived by the leaders, it indicates to employees that the culture doesn’t matter and therefore it doesn’t matter if a person fits or not.  In a “momentum culture” there is congruence at every level from janitor to the C-suite.

It all comes down to this… For your company to grow you have to have all the obvious things like a rock-solid business plan, great procedural implementation and everything else we all know is the back bone of a business. However, for growth to have momentum, it must have legs. The three legs on which your company must be built in order to continue to grow are authentic, inspiring, and transparent leadership.  In other words, A Full Monty Leader.

Now, don’t get the wrong idea. The Full Monty Leader is not a rah-rah leader.  Absolutely not!  A Full Monty Leader will occasionally anger their team, not because they are being adversarial but rather because a Full Monty Leader is required to hold a greater vision of each of the individuals of the team than the members hold for themselves. Only then can team members begin to adopt the vision for themselves. This is an essential principle that will deeply inspire the people who are in your organization for more than a paycheck.

Full Monty Leadership is about developing a culture of authentic, engaged leaders at every level of your organization.  Leaders who feel deeply emotionally connected to the mission purpose and values of the company.

When you have that kind of leadership, you not only generate fierce loyalty but develop a company that is actively growing.

So let me ask you again– What’s Your Business Doing?

For opportunities to have Dõv Baron speak for your organization, Call:

+1 (778) 379-7517

or contact admin@fullmontyleadership.com

×
Transparency THE Key to Successful Leadership
I have a question for you. What is the single most important key to successful leadership in today’s economy?

If you answered anything except being an authentic leader, you’d be wrong.

Being an authentic leader today is no longer a preference or an option. It is crucial!

Now let me be clear.  We are not talking about the idea of being authentic. We aren’t talking about the faux authenticity of sharing something that you think will impress someone.  No, we are talking about being real and genuine, being true to who you are and what you stand for.

An authentic leader is willing to embrace that they will not be everyone’s cup of tea, and what’s more, they are good with that realization. The leaders who are blazing the trail of new leadership are dedicated to developing deeper and deeper authenticity not only in themselves, their teams, but also in all their relationships on an ongoing basis.

They are willing to be who they really are.

Authentic leaders are dedicated to knowing themselves at deeper and deeper levels.  They embrace their own imperfections and they don’t pretend to have it all together.  They are transparent and they are honest about their imperfections, their inadequacies and the challenges they face. Where the old school leader would disown their failures or weaknesses, the authentic leader allows those things to propel them forward, because they understand thatVulnerability is Power.

As counter as it may seem to your original training as a leader, you need to know this at the depth of your being, so let me say it again:  Vulnerability is Power. Vulnerability is the power that will bond your star players to you and your organization. It will also bond your customers and providers to you with fierce loyalty.

I know what some of you are thinking. If you look and act confident that should be enough.  Let me tell you, if you think wearing your mask of confidence is going to work, you are dreaming! People can smell a fake a mile away.  That mask is screaming your insecurities so you might as well hang it up and become transparent.

So what is transparency?

Yes, transparency is about admitting your imperfections, your inadequacies and your challenges. However, it’s also about sharing your values, your mission, your vision and the meaning of why you do what you do. Transparency means opening up and sharing ideas, thoughts, goals, aspirations, values, worries, concerns and even downfalls.

Today’s workplace places high demands on both leaders and employees.More and more employees are now insisting on clearly stated reality and truth.  Apart from the need of a secure job and opportunities for career advancement, present workers desire to be part of a firm that prioritizes truth, trust and transparency. They desire to have proactive leaders who share with them the direction of the organization and are forthright about the future. They want transparency in order to plan for their lives.

Instead of just being content with having a job, today’s employee will often quickly jump ship if the leader they are supposed to follow is unwilling to demonstrate clarity of the future and transparent leadership.  (I go into detail about this in my special report on Becoming a Fierce Loyalty Generator. You can find it here: http://FMLoyalty.com)

Because many companies lack awareness regarding the needs of employees, they struggle to hold on to their star players. As stated in that special report–few things are more disruptive and costly to your business than an unexpected exodus from your talent pool. Despite the initial discomfort of removing the mask, in organizations where transparent, authentic leadership is made a priority, massive losses are prevented.

None of us can be authentic unless we are willing to admit our frustrations, insecurities and weaknesses. This is not to suggest that you should sit around moaning, complaining and whining about your problems—that would be a very poor career move.  However, in both our personal and professional lives, it is crucial that we open ourselves up to a close circle of people we can trust.

All that being said, transparent leadership starts with something few leaders have the cojones to do:  self-examination.

As leaders we can get carried away with knowing all the answers foreverything else outside ourselves and rarely do we take the time to know more about what’s inside ourselves.  In addition, all of us have a spot of denial about our own foibles.

Let’s face it, denial is far easier than facing the harsh truth that we may have some dysfunctional behaviors that we need to deal with. But if we are to become an authentic leader, we need to take off the self viewing rose-colored glasses, increase our self-awareness and uncover our blind spots. In short, you need to know your strengths so that you can capitalize on them. At the same time, you need to know your weaknesses so that you can delegate and deal with them.

Being an authentic leader means having an awareness of the true emotions behind what you feel. In Full Monty Leadership we say, “We are never just mad about what we are mad about.” What this means is your anger may be a cover up, a way to mask your disappointment, fear, shame, jealousy, embarrassment, shame or guilt.  Because authentic leaders are will to always go deeper into self-examination, they can recognize the root of an emotional reaction, and by doing so, gain the power to manage it. (This gives the Full Monty Leader exceptional relationship skills)

Can you honestly (not rhetorically) say why you do what you do in your position? Do you know what irritates you and what soothes you? Are you aware of your own dark side (we all have one) and how to deal with it? In order to be authentic and genuine in all your communications you must know yourself very well and be committed to remaining truly authentic even when it’s uncomfortable.

Because nothing generates fierce loyalty faster that an authentic leader.

Do you have the cojones to become one?

For opportunities to have Dõv Baron speak for your organization, Call:

+1 (778) 379-7517

or contact admin@fullmontyleadership.com

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Our story

Dõv Baron

 

Dõv Baron
Leading Expert

Meet Dõv Baron

One of Inc. Magazine’s Top 100 Leadership Speakers to hire, Dov Baron is a leadership advisor to the United Nations (UN), a bestselling author, the world’s only Corporate Cultural Momentum Strategist, and a top-ranking podcast host. He is also the leading authority on Authentic Leadership, and Leadership Succession or, as he prefers to call it, “Full Monty Leadership.”

Dov is the bestselling author of several books, including “Don’t Read This…Unless You Want More Money!” and his latest, “Fiercely Loyal: How High Performing Companies Develop and Retain Top Talent.” (In-Phase Publishing, 2015 ©)

He also writes for and has been featured in many industry magazines including CNN, CBS Small Business Pulse, SHRM, Yahoo Finance, Boston Globe, Business in Vancouver, USA today, CEO, Entrepreneur and many more.

Dõv’s international Leadership & Loyalty podcast is ranked the number one podcast for Fortune 500 Executives.

Life-Changing Story:

In June 1990, while free rock climbing, Dõv Baron fell approximately 120 feet and landed on his face. The impact shattered most of the bone structure of his face, disintegrating some of his upper jaw and fracturing his lower jaw in four places. After nine reconstructive surgeries, no external evidence remains of the damage; however, this experience was life-changing.

Before the accident, Dõv had spent years building a reputation as a dynamic speaker and teacher in the field of personal and professional development but it wasn’t until sometime after the fall that he began to see the beauty and elegance of what had really happened – the return to his own CORE –what he calls his ‘Authentic Self’. He was also the host and executive producer of the increasingly popular radio show, “Full Monty Leadership Show,” where Authentic Leaders Let it ALL hang out about loyalty, culture and growth, which broadcast out of Seattle, Chicago, Colorado and globally via the internet.

Today:

Today, Dõv has been sharing his wisdom and expertise privately and on international stages with professional leaders for more than 30 years, and has a massive social media platform with over 200,000 followers via Face book, Twitter, LinkedIn, Podomatic, iTunes etc. He has interviewed and worked with leaders featured on: Oprah, Ellen, CNN, Fox, MSNBC, CBS, Huffington Post, Larry King, New York Times, Washington Post, Forbes, the Wall Street Journal and many other top rated media.

His “KIllTheKeynote” campaign to change the speaking industry went viral to over 5 million people on social media. He is now speaking for some of Europe’s wealthiest families at Scone Palace, NextGen leaders with UnleashWD and the Legacy Show, and top American c-suite leaders for The #CSuite Network.

In addition to being an author and a radio host, Dõv is also the leading expert on Developing Authentic Leadership and he is the world’s only Corporate Cultural Momentum Strategist, serving top performance individuals, corporations and organizations to generate both exponential growth and fierce loyalty.

His passion mixed with humour and ‘get to the point’ no BS style are contagious. Within moments, you will feel a genuine connection with a man who authentically walks his talk. Dõv believes that the world needs more leaders who are Authentically committed to standing in their truth, sharing their inner genius, and empowering others to do the same.

Dõv’s commitment is to take you by the hand and show you why tapping into your Authentic Self is the MOST important key to finding, developing, and retaining your top talent.

He is currently available for media interviews.

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PURPOSE, PASSION AND PROFIT IN A DISRUPTIVE AGE.

Leaders today are living in what is arguably the most disruptive time since the beginning of the industrial revolution. The leaders that emerge at the top of their game will be the ones who not only adapt but disrupt the very industries they wish to lead. However, disruption for the sake of disruption is a waste of time, effort and resources and downright damaging! 

According to the research of Richard Foster, Yale University:

“The average life span of a company listed on the S&P 500 has decreased from 67 years (without disruption) in the 1920’s to 15 years today”.

Looking forward, the questions we must boldly face today are: 

  • Do you as a leader know how to tap into the single most important factor that will determine whether your organization stays at the top of their game or fade off into irrelevance?
  • Do you and your organization know what will be the differentiating principles of those that will not only reach the top but also stay there? 
  • Do you know what the number one determining factor of loyalty in both today’s highly skilled workforce and customer base is?

In this presentation Dov Baron will share with you:

  • How you can precisely discover what it takes to tap into the psychological motivations and drivers of your most talented team members and your best customers.
  • You’ll discover why so many leaders fail to follow through on their decisions.
  • You will discover how to precisely how to have them take dynamic action right away.  
  • Discover why working more diligently on your technical skills could put you out of business.
  • Discover what’s transforming current business leaders in the new global market place

This is an exciting and innovative presentation designed for those who are committed to being true industry leaders who thrive in this and the next generation of business and leadership!

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EVOLVING NEXT-GEN AUTHENTIC LEADERSHIP:

The Alchemy Of Turning Leadership Deficits Into Gold (Perfect For Multi-Generational Family Business)

Simply being born into a position of authority no longer guarantees that people will willingly follow you (if it ever did!) Today there is a deep-rooted and ever-growing dissatisfaction with leaders who appear to be entitled and who act self-serving. While no one can change the circumstances of family roots, it is possible and necessary to evolve the culture into a new model of leadership. A model that not only stewards the family legacy, but also integrates it into the necessities of being a contemporary leader. Leadership that include being grounded, empathetic, compassionate, passionate, purpose driven and sincerely authentic.

Such an evolution is no longer just an option. Business today exists within a global realm and requires a new kind of greatness that both embraces and fully utilizes that global aspect. But how do leaders find, embrace, and develop that greatness so that they can become the eminent business “monarchs” the world needs?

In this interactive presentation Dov walks each of the participants through the internal journey of “From Knight to King” that demonstrates the integration of authentic leadership by giving penetrating insight into the four types of knights who are on the path to becoming king (or queen). Each of the knights demonstrates an aspect of a leader that can become dominant and overpowering. The key to effective leadership evolution is to recognize and integrate each of these Knights into the King (or queen).

Here is an overview of the elements required to become a monarch:

In this training Dov Baron takes apart the structure of knighthood and lays it out in a contemporize understanding of leadership.

Everyone who has elevated to the position of leader has in some way shown some natural ability to lead. Nevertheless, we tend to lead in the way that is most familiar, or natural to us. However, we find that those who rise to the top are those who have the ability to grow outside of their natural bound by collecting and coalescing all of the leadership archetypes skills and uses them when and where its most appropriate.  

Below are the four primary leadership archetypes you will need to become a monarch:

  • The Power of the Red Knight:The Red Knight is a leader who symbolizes passion and drive. A lead that has the ability to move things forward and make them happen.
  • The Power of the White Knight:The White Knight is a leader who symbolizes deep empathetic and compassionate care for those they lead. This leader has the ability and the drive to see their people as individuals. The white knight sees trees when others can only see a forest.
  • The Power of the Green Knight:The Green Knight is a leader who symbolizes driven by the desire to have purpose and create legacy. The green knight leader has the ability to see the forest when others only see trees.
  • The Power of the Black Knight:the Black Knight is a leader who symbolizes driven by a desire for an ever-deepening self-knowledge and wisdom. The black knight has a rare ability to remain on task without the insatiable pull for approval. Because of this Black knights are the trailblazers. 

As you read through the overview of each knight there’s a good chance that you felt a certain affinity to one as a dominant and maybe even another on had a secondary pull. That being said, it is crucial is that as much as you are pulled to one, you are not just one of them. Leaders have to take their strengths and expand them to integrate all four archetypes.

If a leader fails to integrate all four or does so in a haphazard or isolated manner such a lead can be extremely detrimental and destructive. Potentially destroying companies, tearing apart teams and effectively chasing away an organizations top talent 

So how do heritage leaders become not just worthy, but truly ready to own the worthiness of their position? By embracing the journey from Knight to Monarch in a way that enables them to assess where they are now, where they would ideally like to be and to create the path that will get them there, both in and outside of the family business and legacy.

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FIERCELY LOYAL EMPLOYEES… Finding And Keeping Your Talent

The world has changed, and so has everything we know about becoming—and remaining—an effective leader when it comes to retaining employees – especially Millennials. In a 2014 Global research study the number one issue facing CEO’s was that of retaining top talent.

Many leaders today are left scratching their heads in confusion as to why many of their very best people simply pick up and walk away… particularly when they seem to be offering great salaries and upward mobility. As you’ll find out in this presentation what we’ve offered in the past and what motivated people to be fiercely loyal no longer works. 

Successful Leadership today requires not just loyalty but FIERCE loyalty. So why is Fiercely Loyal so important? Because it’s the difference between someone waking up inspirited to work for you, thinking of your company as a place for their future, verses being in a place where they want to use the skills and abilities they got from you to take them away form you and on to ‘something better’. The fiercely loyal employee has a deep sense of connection to your organization because it becomes something bigger than them.  As such they become evangelical about the organization making them a top recruiting resource.  

We are in the biggest workforce demographic change of all time, which means that in the immediate future, corporate winners will be decided by the Millennial generation. Those who fail to attract and retain Millennial talent will lose. It’s as simple as that.

Loyalty has become the single most essential ingredient in every successful organization especially with the average cost of turnover to an organization is between 1.5 – 2X the annual salary of that employee. Therefore, the question becomes: How do you develop the kind of leadership and culture that will have your people become not just loyal but Fiercely loyal?

In this Live Interactive Strategy Session, Dov shares how to develop Fiercely Loyal Employees by focusing on:

  • What Creates Loyalty today?
  • The Characteristics of a Notable Leader
  • Creating a culture the generates fierce loyalty
  • Why Purpose Matters More Than Profit in creating a stronger bottom line
  • The 4 C’s: Cooperation, Collaboration, Contribution, Community.
  • The Power of Story Telling
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FIERCELY LOYAL CUSTOMERS… Getting Your Customers To Fall In Love With Your Products. Services And Brand.

Keeping customers loyal has become one of the biggest challenge organizations face today because the values of your customers have changed. The research shows that today’s buyers have far less brand loyalty than the previous generations. Today’s customers, especially Millennials (now approaching 40 at their eldest) want to look good, feel good and do good.

The old rule of business was that a company had to create a professional image. As you will see in this presentation if that is your focus today, when dealing with Millennials you will actually be pushing them away.

Today’s leading businesses understand the number one priority is to create a genuine connection with their customer. This of course is not new, connection has always worked in creating customer loyalty. However, the major difference is the Millennial consumer, doesn’t simply want it they demand it!

Today’s customers are no longer willing to simply buy from you; you have to get them to buy into you. They want to do business with transparent organizations that are purpose driven.

64 percent of consumers point to shared values as their main reason for working with a brand, and 90 percent expect companies to operate responsibly to address social and environmental issues. 64 percent of consumers say they purchase socially responsible products whenever possible.

The companies that are not purpose driven, transparent and socially responsible are already experiencing their customer’s dropping them like a bad date. 

The cutting edge companies who will dominate have a simple yet profound burning question on their minds: What has to happen in order for us to have our customers fall in love with us?

So how do you create a deep connection with your customers and have them fall in love with and become Fiercely Loyal to your organization?  

In this Live Strategy Session, Dov shares how to develop Fiercely Loyal Customers by focusing on:

  • Find out why your organization has been unable to build the authentic leadership needed to create a fiercely loyal customer base.
  • You will have a direct experience how your business can stand the test of time in the disruptive customer dominant environment.
  • Discover why knowing how to share your organizations story is the magnet that will pull your ideal client to you.
  • Uncover the specific strategies and brain science to have your customers think of your brand with love
  • Solve the mystery of why your customer base are already eyeing up your competition.
  • Discover why “Community” is killing retail outlets, and what you can do to have your customers see you as a centre of a community they deeply desire to be part of.

If you are in a business that recognizes how people buy has dramatically changed, and you want to make sure that you are at the leading edge of having them not only buy from you, but into you and your organization make sure you bring Dov Baron in right away.

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FULL MONTY (AUTHENTIC) LEADERSHIP… How Authenticity Increases Loyalty. Productivity And Profit.

The new generation of high performing leaders understand the value and importance of business and success being people-driven.  Not only are they using the latest technologies and strategies to disrupt their industries, they also recognize something old-school leaders never truly grasped: Soft skills (like Emotional Intelligence and being Purpose Driven) have the greatest impact on your bottom-line.

In this interactive presentation Dov walks each of the participants through developing leaders who can lead themselves, their teams, and whole organizations more effectively… Because You Can’t Outsource Authenticity!

We all know the Hans Christian Anderson story of “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” Tailors manipulate an Emperor’s grand sense of self to have him believe he’s wearing the finest fabric ever made. Rather than admit that he can’t see the fabric he denies the truth. Furthermore, when he goes out in a parade with his “new cloths” everyone goes along with the hoax because they too don’t want to look foolish or challenge the powers that be. The hoax is only revealed when a little boy who only knows how to tell the truth gives others the power to do the same.

What this means for your business is this when your leader (like the boy in the story) stands up and reveals the truth s/he empowers others to do the same. The leader becomes “one of us” and we (human beings) are driven to bond with those who speak a truth we have feared to speak. Think Dr Martin Luther King Jr.

Full Monty leadership is about removing the masks of who we appear to be and revealing who we really are to ourselves and to our people. This in turn removes the barriers the block loyalty, productivity, engagement and ultimately profit.

Make sure that you catch this presentation to find out:

  • How companies with leaders who embrace vulnerability outperform competitors with bigger and better resources
  • How vulnerability truly has the power to Generates Fierce Loyalty
  • How the current and prevalent leadership style maybe plaguing your company and negativity impacting your bottom line.
  • Three sentences guaranteed to generate fierce loyalty
  • How to make sure your top-tier talent doesn’t go to your competitor
  • Why being a Full Monty Leader automatically generates leaders inside your organization
  • How vulnerability is the ultimate charismatic trait

Dõv Baron’s “Full Monty Leadership” is inspired by such leaders as Richard Branson, the Dali Lama, Martin Luther King Jr, John F. Kennedy, Jack Welch, and Larry Winget.

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DISCOVERING YOUR LEGACY AND IMPACT POTENTIAL:

What‘s Next For The Lead Who Is Ready To Step Away From The Top.

Who we see ourselves as is so often defined by what we do, but what happens when it’s time to step down?
Stepping down from a position of authority and power can feel a lot like a loss of identity.

When the sun goes down on our career, it’s easy to think that our moment, our hour, our day in the sun has passed…It has not!

There comes a time when we all must ask ourselves what is likely the most difficult question we will ever ask ourselves, “Who am I”. This question is particularly challenging when who we had seen ourselves as is no longer apparent.

The critical moment for many of us comes when we have to make the shift from being able to answer that question with ease to suddenly feeling that instant cold sweat of knowing that to say who we ‘were’ is not the truth of who we ‘are’.

Having made your mark in the world and having received the accolades and recognition that goes along with doing so is a pretty wonderful achievement, and an exhilarating feeling. However, when we are no longer in that position it’s easy to feel like we have somehow lost ourselves.

One of the greatest challenges of being a “champion”, whether in sports, business, on the screen, or anywhere else, is that when we no longer stand in the spot light, it’s easy to feel like we have somehow become invisible.

How we see ourselves has a profound effect on how effective we are in the world. Make no mistake, when our identity is no longer as solid as it once was the impact can be devastating to our self esteem, self worth, our finances, and our relationships.

One of the most important things to do is to change the game so that you can still win past your previous career and status, because you are greater than your last achievements. The fact that next-gen leaders can reinvent and change careers as often as every four years is a great example, because our body of knowledge and experience can actually do that with even more ease than them.

In this interactive event Dov Baron will show you… 

  • Why even the most accomplished leader can feel lost at the thought of stepping down
  • Why contrary to what you may have been told; your best is Not behind you but ahead of you
  • How to tap into the full and mostly untouched potential of who you are (beyond your past accolades)
  • How to take the worst thing that happened to you and make it into the springboard that will propel you too new and greater heights
  • Why stepping away is your golden ticket for future success
  • How to discover and leverage these untouched resources so that you can make an even greater impact, become a hero again and create a powerful legacy!

 

If you are at that stage of life where you are expected to step down, but you know you’re not done…  If you are ready to discover who you ‘are’ beyond the identity of who you ‘were’… If you suspect that your story, your experience could have tremendous value to those coming up, then this is the presentation for you. Because learning how to tell your story from this place will likely be the most powerful and empowering experience of your life, it is your legacy!

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Tap Into the 3 SENTENCES THAT GENERATE FIERCE LOYALTY

Sign Up Today and Receive This Special Report at No Charge (a $47.00 Value) The three sentences you, as a leader, can start using today to have your team hanging on your every word and happily go the extra mile for you and your organization to generate fierce loyalty.